In a big hollywood movie, when somebody saves anothers life, they make a badass quip such as ‘be more careful next time’ or ‘good thing I didn’t miss’. My heroine gets pissed off at me, ME, and runs off leaving me standing in a dark alley next to the body of my once mugger. A week and a half ago, I trashed my car, leaving me to walk all the way to the diner. In a failed atempt to shave a few minutes from my eta, I decided to take the alley between Foster and St.Lucus. Here, Mr. Allen J. Kennedy Jr (Ht 6’1” Wt 217lbs) figured that I had a wallet that he wanted, Stepped into my path, gun drawn, and demanded that I had my wallet over to him. I know his name and information because I am now in possesion of his wallet. Two 50’s, a crumpled single, and a Home Depot gift card. Maybe if he had a picture of his kids and/or wife I would feel some remorse for leaving him lying in this back street. I am almost glad that I’m not calling emergancy services. I doubt I could explain what happend to anyone, much less a badge. I was fumbling around like I couldn’t find my billfold. I knew perfectly where it is. At home, on my dresser. I’m not driving and my meals are free (curtosy of my sister and her awesome manager powers), why would I bother carrying it along. Mr Kennedy tells me to ‘hurry up’ and that he’s ‘not f*cking around’. There is a black pistol pointed at my face, I know he’s not effing around. I’m on the brink of pissing myself (in self defence), when, poof!, she appears.
Music is my life. I remember my dad letting my listen to vinyl copies of ‘Another One Bites The Dust’ and ‘Godzilla’, and asking, no, begging for him to move the needle back to square one when the song finished. I remember my mom putting on Chipmunk Rock, and I’d enjoy squeaky renditions of ‘Jessie’s Girl’ and ‘Hit Me with Your Best Shot’. When I got my first radio/cassette player, I wore out Hank Jr’s ‘America, The Way I See it’ and AC/DC’s ‘Who Made Who’. I knew the lyrics to ‘Under The Bridge’ and ‘Money For Nothing’.
In the sixth grade, I started to record songs off of the radio. Mostly, because it is cheaper for 5 blank tapes, than for 18 new cd’s. These tapes piled up, and sometimes, I’d record over them with newer songs.
On one with a poorly drawn lizard, I compiled a true mix tape.
Ozzy’s Mr. Crowley, Outlaws’ Ghost Riders, Ratt, Kiss, Kid Rock, GnR, NRG, and others all copied from their various formats and sequenced to magnetic tape, and played at high volumes so many times that I can’t listen to ‘Heavens on fire’ with out wondering where the warble and fading went.
Nowadays I Burn cd’s. Some of these mixes are just mixes that fit a mood or attempt to draw out a different mood. Some are memories.
Mix #6, Class of 2006.
1. Man In The Box, Alice In Chains Blaring from my Jeep after a showing of ‘Sandlot’ at the Kelso Pub.
2. Learning To Fly, Pink Floyd Winterball with Helen, not knowing if I wanted to chaos I was causing.
3. Redneck Gigolo, Terrell Shooting Pool at Pokey Joes with John and Dustin.
4. Dare, Gorillaz Sitting on the roof of my jeep at one of Gray and Colby’s bonfires.
5. Crazy Bitch, Buck Cherry Roofing That summer with Tim and Namm. A little bit of Katy in their somewhere too.
6. Foxey Lady, Jimi Hendrix It always reminds me of Brandi and her party.
7. Rip out The Wings Of A Butterfly, HIM My 18th @ Whitneys, and the loss of 2 different friends that weekend.
8. Strutter, The Donnas The redhead I met at the concert.
9. Last Nite (Live), The Strokes Skipping Autoshop
10. Welcome Home, Coheed and Cambria The Night four of us drove to Portland to See Coheed Live.
11. I Will Refuse, The Ministry/Pailhead The Joshes Stealing a flag from the golf course @ 3am.
12. Mob Goes Wild, Clutch Hanging out with Gray, BOB, and Luke on Skip Day.
13. 12:51, The Strokes Fwooosh.
14. Blitzkrieg Bop, The Ramones For mine and Du’cks Ringtones.
15. Scotty Doesn’t Know, Lustra Flying Down Pacific/The night with Katy, Chris, & Chubbs.
16. Cowboys From Hell, Pantera Arriving At school to early with Brandon.
17. Burn, Burn, LostProphets Failing to start ‘Reclaimed’.
18. Swing Life Away, Rise Against Greg’s Basement.
19. Sunday Morning, Maroon 5 Driving home the next morning, windows down, stereo up, and shirtless.
19 songs, 71 mins that sum up an entire year of my life, preserved on plastic.
Its an idea I have had for three years now. A publisher like Future, that produces magazines on varied subjects, should offer Custom Magazines. Take 2-4 articals from each, print them across a few bound pages. Then take, for instance, the BMX, guitar, and hot rod mini-mags, and package them together and ship ‘em.
I know there are sites on the internet that do similar services, but I can’t be clicking links in a waiting room, on the road, or on the throne.
What the HELL happened to attractive beautiful female celebrities? I look at photos of girls like Megan Fox, and wonder, “How is she popular?” She can not act, she has 0 personality, and looks that fail to impress. I skim over sites of ‘Hot/Sexy Celebs’ and wonder how most of them ever got atop of the fictional pedestal we placed them on. I am not saying they’re all ugly beasts. Hell most I wouldn’t mind tossing around undercovers for a night or two. But nothing about these girls places them above the loose-legged fems that graduated at my side. I see a photo shoot of Kelly Brook and the MOST I get from it is ‘Hey, I like how (someone else) did her eye makeup.”
I know I’m referring to modern celebs as girls. because to me that is all most of them are. Ann Margarete is a women. Allison Parks is a women. Mamie Van Doren is a women. Kirsten Dunce is a girl. Lindsey Lohan is a girl. Lady Gaga is …um…a freak.
Look up any star from 53-79. good luck finding a bad photo. Even in candid ‘worst-day-ever’ pic, most look gorgeous. Try saying the same for your little 19yo pinup.
ok this is kinda morbid but I still want to go do it. The local halloween haunted house has a ride this year called ‘the last ride’. You get in a faux coffin, its a simulation ride so you feel everything the way it would feel as if you were really in the coffin….from the funeral to the walk to the car, to the drive, being lowered in the ground, ect. you also hear the sounds that would go along with it.
I think it would be fascinating to do, I mean what would be going through your head during those moments?!
i did this EXACT thing last year! getting inside of a real coffin was the only morbid part. i laughed the entire way through it. maybe that’s the REAL creepy part?
I have a feeling that I’d A) be laughing maniacally or B) sleeping